Tuesday, May 22, 2007

JoePaLEEEEZZE!!!!!

JoePaLEEEEZZE!!!!!

It has been a while, but I’m finally back. There has been so much that I have wanted to talk about in the past month and a half, but with my schedule, it has been really tough.

I mean I missed Zach Johnson win the Masters, or should I say Tiger Woods lose the Masters. I never wrote about the Final Four. I missed the chance to write about the TERRIBLE decision made by the NBA, which ruined the playoffs. I also missed the great upset story of the playoffs, with Golden State beating the Dallas Mavericks. I missed spring football.

So what is it that is so important that brought me back today?? No, it wasn’t the NBA lottery or the terrible pitching of the Pirates. It is the latest on my favorite coach in the history of coaching, Joe Paterno.

Yeah the guy is 80 and probably delusional and didn’t realize he was giving this recent interview that has made headlines (quite frankly I think he is dead and has been for the past 4-5 years, and JayPa has been wearing is body on the sidelines so he finally could feel like he was an important part of the Penn State football team). He probably just thought he was talking to his morning bowl of oatmeal or something along those lines. Regardless, I can’t believe what idiotic phrases came out of his mouth during this interview.

So, some writer from the AP catches up with JoePa (wouldn’t be difficult considering he still can’t walk after the greatest hit in Wisconsin football history), and discusses the upcoming season. They talk about the fact that Joe is 80 years old. They discuss the fact that his salary is not being made public (which is a joke. If he is a state employee, which he is, the citizens of that state have a right to know what he is being paid). They discuss his 363 career wins, all at Penn State. The talk about him changing his own Depends at halftime of the Ohio State game last year. And they also discuss the “skirmish” that took place with some of his players. That is what I want to talk about.

SKIRMISH? SKIRMISH, Joe?!! Really is that what we call it now a days when SIX football players go INTO another students dorm and beat him up. Oh, I’m sorry it wasn’t a skirmish as I said, according to the god of Happy Valley it was a, “little skirmish.” A little skirmish is what happens every play involving the Penn State offensive line and the opponents’ defensive line just before Anthony Morelli is implanted into the ground. This was an all out mugging or lynching.

If you are not familiar with the story let me fill you in:

“Six Penn State football players, including stars Anthony Scirrotto and Justin King, turned themselves in Friday to face charges that they barged into a party and started a violent fight at an off-campus apartment earlier this month.
Each player faces at least one felony count of criminal trespass. Scirrotto, a safety, faces the most serious charges, including two other felonies _ burglary and criminal solicitation.”

* This according to an article written by AP writer Mark Scolforo on April 27th.

Yeah that sounds like a “little skirmish.”

JoePa also was quoted describing the events of what happened as saying, “He got a little irate, called up a couple of his buddies and said, ’Hey, come on down.’ They went over there and they got in a fight.”

BUT DON’T WORRY, THESE PLAYERS WILL BE PUNISHED!!!!!!

Granted they probably won’t miss a snap of football this season, especially since 3 of the players are without a doubt the 3 best players in their defensive secondary. All 6 players are expected to play key roles in the Penn State defense this season with as many of 5 of the 6 winning starting spots before the season begins. Paterno all but says that when asked about the punishment, saying, “My biggest concern is what’s going to come out of that incident that we had. I’m hopeful that people will keep their heads, won’t go overboard on it. What it basically comes down to is, it was a fight.”

BUT DON’T WORRY, THESE PLAYERS WILL BE PUNISHED!!!!

What type of punishment would such an act land you when you are a member of a major football program, you might ask. Well that is simple, as Joe Paterno handed out a harsh punishment recently to his ENTIRE team: the Nittany Lions will clean Beaver Stadium on the Sunday’s after every home game.

HUH?! Really?!? That is the punishment?

This is SO wrong on SO many levels.

First, Joe, will the people whose job this had been in the past still get paid or are you taking away the jobs of people in Happy Valley?

Secondly, why is the WHOLE team being punished for the stupid acts of 6 players?

And finally, do you think for one second that ANYONE believes that you will have these players ACTUALLY cleaning Beaver Stadium? Yeah you may wake them up and get them to the Erector Set that sits on campus that doubles as both a football stadium AND one of the wonders of the world to all 6th grade science nerds nation-wide, but will I really see Dan Connor scrubbing the Men’s room urinals, or Anthony Morelli sweeping the steps, or Derrick Williams lugging garbage to dumpsters?? I doubt it.

Coach Paterno, you can’t be serious with this. Please just give it up.

I'm not going to lie, I've ALWAYS HATED this man.

I used to hate you because both my parent were Pitt fans and, being a Pitt fan from day 1 that is what I was raised to do.

Then I grew my own opinions and hated you cause you were arrogant and thought that you were better than the game itself and would no longer play Pitt, ruining, what was at one time, one of the biggest rivalries in college football.

Now I hate you because you are making a mockery of the game that I so dearly love.

So, now, I’m just asking this of you, just give it up. You are ruining a proud and reputable program by making an absolute joke the way you have handled off-field issues. After a stretch of bad seasons you sold your soul to the devil, and now have no regard for the quality of person you recruit as long as they are fast and strong. In turn you have ruined the prestige and tradition that went with the all white uniforms of Penn State football.